Norma with husband, Preston and their children, Donovan, 9 and Noelani, 4
My name is Norma Occhiline and I am a 32 year old woman who was diagnosed with fibromyalgia in October of 2007. I believe my fibromyalgia was brought on by stress. I never considered my body as being a living organism needing plenty of food and rest to work properly. As a younger adult I kept this sensation of not needing certain things to push on through life; with little money following my parents’ divorce I learned of hunger and that I could work with it when necessary.
I had just started a new job as an office manager of a dental practice in June of 2007 and was also a mommy to a one year old who slept in two hour intervals since birth. Since my husband and I brought in just enough money to cover living expenses, keeping daycare costs low was a top priority. We had a family member willing to watch our daughter and take our kindergarten son to a nearby school for cheap. However, she lived 20 miles west from our home in Phoenix, Arizona and I worked 20 miles east from our home. I would leave the house at 5:00 am to arrive to open at 7:00 am four days a week.
That doesn’t seem like such a bad exchange at all; a little longer drive to save money. What I haven’t told you yet is that I was also a full time student at Arizona State University’s West Campus in Glendale. Three days out of the week I would drive straight from work to school, approximately a forty minute drive, and then arrive home around 10:00 pm. If you add the drive, work, school and baby schedule all together, you get one unhappy and very tired momma.
But being the fighter that I was, already beating Uterine Cancer at 20, preeclampsia with my son’s pregnancy and gestational diabetes with constant nausea during my daughter’s pregnancy, I had no choice but to continue on every day. Sleep or no sleep and food or no food, I kept on each day.
Then in the fall I started to notice changes in my body. My legs hurt every day, like waking up feeling as if I had run a marathon in my sleep. I was not just tired anymore, but physically exhausted. I was falling asleep everywhere and sometimes during class I couldn’t even get the energy to move my pencil. One of my teachers returned an essay and asked who wrote it because it wasn’t up to my usual standard. I read the paper and couldn’t understand what it meant either. I started to get scared. Then one evening my skin felt as if it was on fire. Anything that touched my skin felt like a hot iron. By then I was terrified.
I had been seeing my primary care physician and he finally referred me to a rheumatologist. He diagnosed me in October as having fibromyalgia and suggested life changes. So I quit my great job and became an inbound call representative for a nearby business and dropped school to half time. Gradually things were getting tolerable because I got more time to sleep. The leg pains never left and more often than not I could barely make it to work, especially in the summer heat. However, as usual I kept pushing myself and got my daughter on a sleep schedule. By early 2009 things started to stabilize health wise. My flare-ups were coming if I didn’t get enough sleep, with hot or humid weather, right before and during my menstrual cycle. But sometimes they were random and took me down for no reason. All of these are my current status, except for the leg pains. Since being prescribed an approved medication for fibromyalgia, I do not have leg pains as often, which I am very grateful for.
Another thing different a year later is that I am now disabled. In April of 2009 I was rear- ended by a woman who was talking on the phone. I now have three bulging disks in my neck and damaged ones in my lower back. This constant pain had caused me to lose my job and all of my income. I am on several medications for both conditions. I have lost 40 pounds and weigh only 115; that is what I weighed at 16.
Every day is a struggle to go on; of course some are worse than others and I can only watch life go by. On the few days I can push myself to get out of the house I enjoy every minute of it. I am still in school by taking online courses through A.S.U. but had to change my major. Who knows if I’ll ever get to use my diploma, but I’m not going to let anything stand in the way of achieving. I want to achieve healing (both mental and physical), my diploma and being the best mom and wife I could have been.
My husband, Preston is my best friend and my ’caretaker’ as I like to call him. He has been with me and continues to support and help me in any way he can. I also have the best support system with friends and family, especially my mother who calls daily to see how I am doing.
I don’t blame anyone for the suffering I have and will continue to endure. I am reading on Buddhism and how to create an inner peace to help me through those dark hours of pain. I also listen to the Beatles and when I am vomiting from the pain I rock back and forth while singing the first song that comes into my head.
Despite all of my pain and daily depression, nothing makes me feel more alive than to watch my children smile. I am also very lucky to have such an adoring husband by my side. My life is worth living and I am going to live it the best way I can.
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Norma
that really helped reading your story. I have recently been diagnosed with fibromyalgia. I’m still trying to get my head around it all and lately some days are just unbearable, but I am just soldiering on. My counsellor mentioned it may have been all the stress I have had in my life over the last few years. My Doctor thinks it may been form a virus I had last year. Maybe it’s the combination. thank you for your story and I wish you all the best.